just when you thought americans might be wising up...

so, the president's approval ratings may be at nixonian levels, but tthat doesn't mean that americans aren't buying his arguments about the upcoming world war III in iran.  

via rawstory:

Despite President Bush's perpetually abysmal approval ratings, it appears his increasingly hostile rhetoric against Iran has drummed up enough fear of a "nuclear holocaust" or aWorld War III that a majority of Americans are in favor of a US strike against the country aimed a curtailing its apparent nuclear ambitions, a new poll shows.

The Zogby International survey shows 52 percent of Americans would support a strike on Iran, while 53 percent expect President Bush to launch such an attack before the end of his second term...Just 29 percent of Americans think the US should not attack Iran.

well, there goes that idea...

Obama would snub VP offer from Hillary if asked

asked if he would serve as the vice presidential half of a Clinton-Obama ticket...“No,” he said. “I’m not running for vice president, I’m running for president of the United States.”

pot to kettle: "you're black!"

comment on thee federal response to the wildfires in california:

"We have learned those lessons (from Katrina) and those lessons are being applied...The White House needs to recognize that we are overstretched and that there is a problem. They need to increase the size of the regular Army and stop relying so much on the National Guard.”

damn skippy, right? but guess who said it...yep, eck of a job brownie," aka michael brown of arabian horse and fema fame. oy.

right-wing facebook

i wonder if larry craig taps you instead of poking...hmm...that and other deep, very important issues are addressed at a new (satirical) website that answers the question every single american has wanted to know: what if republican presidential candidates has their own facebook!?

fire pope!!!

again, kudos to wonkette on picking this up off the ap wire:

Beloved anti-Nazi pope John Paul II is back, according to Vatican TV. And this time, he is a terrible fire monster! We know about this because we accidentally had CNN Headline News on the other day, with the sound off, for some reason we can no longer remember, and suddenly there’s a terrible picture of the dead pope next to another picture of the Fire Pope. (It was on that douchesack Glenn Beck’s show that nobody has ever intentionally watched.)

This hilarious picture of a campfire has been in every downmarket tabloid in Europe this week, and the poorer/dumber people apparently really believe the beloved pope has returned to Earth, briefly, in the form of a terrifying burning devil. Or a campfire.

The thrilling development was also on the Fox News show “Fox & Friends,” according to some people who actually watch “Fox & Friends”:

The headline read ‘Bonfire Miracle’ and underneath it said ‘Believers see Pope’s image. Several times they said that a fire would never take that shape and used the miracle word. Comments: Fox and Friends spoke several times about the miracle fire that appeared to be the Pope. Doocy said, “That’s the Pope” and Camerota said, “Absolutely.”

“Bonfire Miracle.” That is kind of awesome.

Because the Catholic god apparently has a hell of a sense of humor, when Nazi Pope Joseph Ratzinger dies he’s going to come back to Earth as a nice puppy.

"perfecting" coultergiest

since she thinks the jews need some perfecting, the good folks at maxim (there's a phase i never thought i'd utter) have put together some tips for how coultergiest can perfect her/him/its - self

obama related to bush and cheney?!?! wtf!?!?

ughhh, not that this really means anything, it just seems depressing for some reason:

via rawstory:

Vice President Dick Cheney and aspiring Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama may not share a political philosophy, but they do share a family tree.

The vice president's wife, Lynne, said during an interview with MSNBC on Tuesday that her husband and Obama were eighth cousins, a fact she discovered while researching family ancestry for her new memoir.

“This is such an amazing American story that one ancestor ... could be responsible down the family lines for lives that have taken such different and varied paths as Dick’s and Barack Obama,” she said.

Ginny Justice, a spokeswoman for Mrs. Cheney, told MSNBC that Obama is a descendant of French Huguenot Mareen Duvall, whose son wed the granddaughter of the Englishman Richard Cheney in the 1600's.

Fox News on Wednesday also cited a report last month in the Chicago Sun-Times, which indicated Obama also had a distant genealogical connection to President Bush. The two are 11th cousins, according to the paper.

"Every time some new president gets installed -- elected to the United States presidency -- somebody does the whole lineage and, invariably, it leads back to the Queen of England," said Fox and Friends co-host Steve Doocy. "Everybody's always related to the Queen of England."

An Obama spokesman commented that "every family has a black sheep."

the new rationale for supressing the black vote in ohio in 2004

apparently, your constitutional voting right only works in the early part of the day...

via rawstory:
Judiciary Chairman John Conyers (D-MI) rebuked a Justice Department voting official Friday night who said Ohio's African American voters faced long lines in the 2004 presidential election because blacks tend to vote at night.

Justice Department Voting Section Chief John Tanner's "investigation of the 2004 election in Ohio concluded that long lines and late voting precincts were due to the fact that white voters tend to cast ballots in the morning and black voters cast ballots in the afternoon."

Why did African American voters suffer long lines in Ohio?

Tanner wrote in a letter TPM Muckraker uncovered that "...the principal cause of the difference appears to be the tendency in Franklin County for white voters to cast ballots in the morning, and for black voters to cast ballots in the afternoon. We have established this tendency through local contacts and through both political parties, and it accords with our considerable experience in other parts of the United States. Morning voters may wait in line several hours, as happened in white precincts, without keeping the polls open after 7:30 am; this is not the case, however, at sites where voters arrive after 5:30 p.m."

Voters in black counties faced far longer lines than those in the more white Ohio suburbs. Investigations showed that Ohio officials had deliberately placed fewer voting machines in some areas and in some instances even kept voting machines out of service. The resulting lines generally resulted in less individuals voting because the lines were so long.

coultergiest wants jews to be "perfected," just like her/him/it

the female impersonator herself is again in the news for making an outrageously awful statement.  i could rant about her/him/it, but instead i will wisely bow to wonkette's much better analysis of this:

OH SHUT THE FUCK UP:

ANN COULTER WILL ANNIHILATE THE JEWS

We’re on a pretty strict “Ignore People Who Deliberately Say Provocative Shit For Big Money,” because otherwise we’d spend all day repeating whatever dull outrage from Rush Limbaugh, Don Imus, Bill O’Reilly, Pat Robertson, etc. But today we are sort of compelled to note that beloved entertainer Ann Coulter has called for the end of Judaism, and the end of the Jews in general.

How will the hard-living old gal finally complete Hitler’s Dream? She’s going to convert all the poor lost Jews to her religion. (Christianity, apparently. Who knew?)

On a CNBC talk show Monday night — who watches CNBC after the markets close? — Coulter was talking to host Donny Deutsch about whatever, and then she demanded that all Jews be converted to Christianity so they would become “perfected,” like she is.

We assume all the people who are so excited about nuking Iran because Ahmadinejad is one of those holocaust-denier nutcases will immediately call for the U.S. to bomb Ann Coulter — or at least boycott Coulter and any teevee station that lets her on the air and any book store that sells her terrific books, right? Right?

and the amsterdam tourist industry takes a hit...

watch fox noise cover this and not one word about al gore winning the fricking nobel peace prize...

Netherlands bans magic mushrooms

The Dutch government is banning the sale of all magic mushrooms after a series of high-profile incidents involving tourists who had taken them.

The decision will go into effect within several months, said a spokesman for the Dutch justice ministry. A major Dutch producer of the psychedelic mushrooms said he stood to lose millions of euros as a result. The Netherlands is famed for its liberal drugs policy, with marijuana openly sold in licensed cafes. Magic mushrooms, more properly known as psilocybe, contain the psychedelic chemicals psilocybin and psilocin. "We intend to forbid the sale of magic mushrooms," said justice ministry spokesman Wim van der Weegen. "That means shops caught doing so will be closed." Currently in the Netherlands the sale of dried magic mushrooms - in which the psychoactive chemicals psilocybin and psilocin are stronger - is banned but fresh mushrooms are allowed. This is because it is more difficult to ascertain how much of the chemicals fresh mushrooms contain. But Mr Van der Weegen said this was exactly the issue.
"The problem with mushrooms is that their effect is unpredictable. It's impossible to estimate what amount will have what effect." Calls for a re-evaluation of the drug grew after a 17-year-old French girl jumped from a building after eating magic mushrooms during a school trip to Amsterdam in March. Other incidents involving the drug have included an Icelandic tourist jumping from a balcony and breaking both legs and a Danish tourist driving his car wildly through a camping ground, narrowly missing sleeping campers. "It's a shame, the media really blew this up into a big issue," said Chloe Collette, owner of the FullMoon shop, which sells magic mushrooms in Amsterdam. She said all the incidents had involved magic mushrooms in conjunction with other drugs. Murat Kucuksen, whose farm supplies about half the magic mushrooms on sale in the Netherlands, said he stood to lose several million euros as a result of the ban. Users of fresh mushrooms experience effects ranging from giggling fits and intensification of colours, lights and sounds to, more rarely, hallucinations. Negative effects can include vomiting, and anxiety.

another one?!?! what is it with republicans and getting caught soliciting gay, toe-tapping, bathroom sex?

Another Republican elected official– a pal of David Diapers Vitter no less– caught toe-tappin’ in the boys room! And he wants wanted to be a state senator too! Yesterday’s Times-Picayune painted another dismal picture of another Republican pervert who trawls from public restroom to public restroom looking for… love? Well, looking for something. Joey DiFatta is the chairman of St. Bernard Parish Council and a prominent Republican leader (until 2004 on the GOP state party Executive Committee). He just withdrew from his state senate race, after his arrests for lewd behavior in a public restroom were made public. Read more…

From the Times-Picayune article it appears DiFatta may have been Larry “Super Tuber” Craig’s mentor:

The report said DiFatta slid his foot into the deputy’s stall and tapped the deputy’s foot. In the report, Conley noted that such activity is common among men to indicate a willingness to participate in sex.

The deputy inside the stall, Detective Wayne Couvillion, responded by tapping his foot, and DiFatta reached under the partition and began to rub the deputy’s leg, the report states.

The detective asked DiFatta, “What do you want?” according to the report, and he replied, “I want to play with you.”

dick nixon on fred thompson

"Oh shit, he's dumb as hell." - May 1973

thank god for recording devices.

wonkette celebrates columbus day

Christopher Columbus Was a Dick

One thousand years ago today — or Friday, the 12th — a terrible slave-trading murderer/imbecile who did not even know how to spell his own name, which is Latin for “asshole,” landed at the “Sandals” resort in Puerto Rico or some such Caribbean island and thought he was in Bangalore. What an idiot!

There is no political news today and the Capitol is vacant and even The Capitolist is quiet all because Cristóbal Colón basically did not know math and mistakenly went to the Bahamas because the Islamofascists had cut off the road to India, where Europe outsourced all the white people’s jobs. (Previously, Genghis Khan was a NAFTA signatory so it was all fine, until the Muslims!)

Seriously, Columbus was retarded. To his death, he was convinced the mountains of Cuba were the fucking Himalayans. George W. Bush is smart compared to Christopher Columbus, that’s how stupid Columbus was.

So on his third journey to the “Wrong India” he set up a death camp for all the “Indians” who were actually Carib tribespeople known for their colorful reggae hats and “ganja.” He killed all of those people and also many Spaniards, who finally overthrew his cruel regime and sent his ass back to Spain, where he became a total Jesus Freak and spent the rest of his life bumming people out, the end.

To this day, hippies have protests against “KIillumbus” landing in the Bahamas 515 years ago, because marching around with signs is a very effective form of going back in time and killing Columbus.

more san francisco values

not only is she a grandmother (republicans say booooooooo), but she prays (i thought all democrats hated the baby jesus?!) and she's thinking of the children...cause someone needs to seeing as the president hated (read, vetoed) children and their healthcare last week.

via rawstory.com

Fox News' Chris Wallace, during an interview with House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) on Fox News Sunday, mentions a recent assertion by the Speaker that she was praying for President Bush to have a change of heart in his veto of recent legislation to increase the scope of the SCHIP program.

Wallace probes Pelosi to see who else, and what else, she includes in her prayer sessions.

Transcript follows:

WALLACE: You said the other day that you were praying for President Bush to change his mind about vetoing SCHIP. Do you pray for our soldiers to win in Iraq?

PELOSI: Of course I do.

WALLACE: To win?

PELOSI: Of course I do. Of course. What a question. First of all, I pray for President Bush all the time, and I--prayed especially hard that he would sign the...children's health bill, because it's so important to America's children.

WALLACE: When you pray for President Bush, what do you pray for?

PELOSI: I pray that, that--well, at the same time as I pray for him, I pray for America's children, and that there can be some compatibility in their thinking. But I pray for his health; his well-being. I pray that he makes the right decisions for the American people, but, when I was--

WALLACE: --Do you ever pray for him to change his policies?

PELOSI: All the time! But--let me draw a line: When I was growing up in politics, we were always told that we shouldn't pray for a political outcome -- that we just pray that God's will would be done. We pray for the children, we pray for the poor people, we pray for people who need help; and we always, always, always pray for our men and women in uniform, who make our freedom to pray possible

coutergiest wants to take the vote away from women...

...but of course female impersonator coultergiest could still vote, adam's apple and all...

In an interview with the New York Observer, conservative commentator, frequent Fox guest, and alleged plagiarist Ann Coulter left this choice quote, which the Observer highlighted as "On women:"

COULTER: If we took away women's right to vote, we'd never have to worry about another Democrat president. It's kind of a pipe dream, it's a personal fantasy of mine, but I don't think it's going to happen. And it is a good way of making the point that women are voting so stupidly, at least single women.

It also makes the point, it is kind of embarrassing, the Democratic Party ought to be hanging its head in shame, that it has so much difficulty getting men to vote for it. I mean, you do see it’s the party of women and 'We’ll pay for health care and tuition and day care -- and here, what else can we give you, soccer moms?'

and it's DEMOCRATIC president, ann...at least get the name of the party right. oh, and lets not forget that in 2006, coultergiest allegedly violated Florida law by voting in the wrong precinct. The short version, according to The Brad Blog, which has closely followed the ongoing story:

"She committed third-degree voter fraud in Palm Beach County when she lied on her registration. Period. Dead to rights. She also lied on her driver's license down there (another third-degree felony) and knowingly voted at the wrong precinct (first degree misdemeanor). Again, all dead to rights. The link above offers all the proof any attorney with balls bigger than Coulter's would need. And here's her fraudulent Voter Registration form to boot."

mr. president, what is your job?

via thinkprogress.org:

During the course of an hour-long speech today, President Bush used the word “decisions” — or a derivative of it — at least 30 times. At the outset of his speech, “the decider” (aka “the decision-maker” and “commander guy“) declared:

"My job is a decision-making job. And as a result, I make a lot of decisions. And it’s important for me to have an opportunity to speak to you and others who would be listening about the basis on which I have made decisions, to explain the philosophy behind some of the decisions I have made."

...and he didn't stop there...later in the speech, he declared:

”I delegate to good people. I always tell Condi Rice, ‘I want to remind you, Madam Secretary, who has the Ph.D. and who was the C student. And I want to remind you who the adviser is and who the president is.’

I got a lot of Ph.D.-types and smart people around me who come into the Oval Office and say, ‘Mr. President, here’s what’s on my mind.’ And I listen carefully to their advice. But having gathered the device (sic), I decide, you know, I say, ‘This is what we’re going to do.’ And it’s ‘Yes, sir, Mr. President.’ And then we get after it, implement policy."

president bush - veto #4

so, now we can add stopping expansion of children's health coverage to stem cell research and bringing the troops home as the only things the president has ever deemed worthy of a veto. ughhhh....

dateline: washington d.c.:

President George W Bush has vetoed a bill to expand a children's healthcare insurance scheme, after it was passed with a large majority in the Senate.

Mr Bush argues it takes the programme beyond its original purpose of insuring children from low-income families.

The vetoed bill proposed higher tobacco taxes to provide an extra $35bn (£17bn) to insure some 10 million children.

Children's health insurance is set to be a campaign issue in next year's elections, analysts say.

Eighteen Republican senators joined Democrats last week in passing the legislation by a 67-29 vote.

But the House of Representatives, which approved the bill by 265-159, was well short of the two-thirds majority needed to override a veto.

It is only the fourth time Mr Bush has used his veto power in the course of his presidency....Democrats in the House say they will seek to persuade sufficient Republican congressmen to change sides to be able to override Mr Bush's veto.

But House Republican leader Roy Blunt said he was "absolutely confident" that he would be able to prevent that happening.

slavery "history," right-wing style

ok, so michael "just go back to reviewing movies already you big blow-hole" medved decided to write a column trying to address what he believes are liberal falsehoods (read: the truth) regarding slavery. as if that wasn't scary enough in the abstract, he manages to outdo even his own inner racial doucebaggery with these assertions:

SLAVERY EXISTED ONLY BRIEFLY, AND IN LIMITED LOCALES, IN THE HISTORY OF THE REPUBLIC – INVOLVING ONLY A TINY PERCENTAGE OF THE ANCESTORS OF TODAY’S AMERICANS.

WHILE AMERICA DESERVES NO UNIQUE BLAME FOR THE EXISTENCE OF SLAVERY, THE UNITED STATES MERITS SPECIAL CREDIT FOR ITS RAPID ABOLITION

and extra doucebaggery points for this one:
THERE IS NO REASON TO BELIEVE THAT TODAY’S AFRICAN-AMERICANS WOULD BE BETTER OFF IF THEIR ANCESTORS HAD REMAINED BEHIND IN AFRICA

briefly? rapid abolition? better off not enslaved? wow, this is a true lasagna of right-wing awful. layers and layers...i can't wait to see the doucebaggery of his inevitable sequel: how smallpox actually helped native americans and how much better off they were thanks to the Dawes Act.