dunce-cap nation of retards

the new newsweek has a piece on just how misinformed americans are. more people know who won american idol than who the chief justice of the supreme court is. oy. wonkette had some salient comments on the article:

How dumb are Americans? A fifth of you think most of the 9/11 hijackers were from Iraq, which makes sense as 41% of you think the September 11, 2001, attacks were an Iraqi military operation. An elite 11% were able to identify the chief justice of the Supreme Court.

If you’ve wondered who could possibly approve of Dick Cheney, it is likely the same 10% who believe the American or British empires predate the Roman Empire, or the 8% who chose “sports utility vehicles” as the one thing that definitely does not contribute to global warming.

justice waaaaaaaaaaaaay delayed

with a quick scan of CNN and MSNBC, you may think that the only news has to do with paris hilon or a missing white pregnant lady in ohio, but it's funny when you look at what's making headlines in britain:

Next month James Fowler is expected to be charged in Alabama with the 1965 killing of Jimmie Jackson - which triggered the Selma to Montgomery civil rights march famously attacked by police on the Edmund Pettus Bridge in Selma...Federal authorities in the US are under pressure to make a final effort to bring unsolved race crimes from the civil rights era to trial after a 71-year-old former Ku Klux Klansman was found guilty of charges over the 1964 deaths of two black teenagers.

James Seale was convicted on Thursday of kidnapping and conspiracy in the killings of Henry Dee and Charles Moore, who were found dead in the Mississippi river after they went missing while hitchhiking. The federal jury heard that the teenagers had been brutally beaten before being dropped into the river tied to heavy weights. Seale now faces a life sentence.

meanwhile, at gonzo's justice department:

Bradley J. Schlozman is systematically attempting to purge all Civil Rights appellate attorneys hired under Democratic administrations...he appeared to be "targeting minority women lawyers" in the section and was replacing them with "white, invariably Christian men"...Schlozman told one recently hired attorney that it was his intention to drive these attorneys out of the Appellate Section so that he could replace them with 'good Americans.'

for every long delayed step forward we get two steps backward...and these are the same folks who don't think we need the voting rights act anymore.

mike gravel: keeping the dems interesting

yep, the crazy due from alaska is back making the democratic primaries 'bearable' thanks to his antics. first, it was the hilarious youtube "rock in pond" video:

now, it turns out he's been hitting the d.c. gay bar scene.

i cannot wait to see what this dude does next...please oh please let him hang around the race for a while...i may even sit through another whole debate to see what comes out of his mouth...or at least watch the highlights, that is. one can only take so much chris matthews.

hordes of zombies v. the fbi...my money's on the zombies

leave it to the bbc to be the ones to pick this story up.

stalling for time...or conspiracy theory?

one of two things: the bush administration really doesn't want to deal with anything "sensible," especially about drugs and students, or bush plans on finding a way to stay in power for twenty more years...or maybe both [*chill*].

who wants to be a senator?

yep, the death of sen. thomas (r-wy) has left the already troubled gop in more trouble...apparently, nobody wants the seat. so, the gop turns to the next logical step (other than alan keyes), they post a want ad on the wyoming gop website. just think of it...."you could be the next senator from our country’s least populous state, thus living out your dream of having a ridiculously disproportionate amount of power in an ostensibly representative democracy!"

the iphone is a liberal, san francisco values loving threat

ahhh, nice to see the ipod ads reminding us of those days last november) when we thought that nancy pelosi was going to take over the government and get us out of iraq...memories.

this opens the floodgate of "iphone hates america, freedom, god, unborn babies, etc." jokes...or maybe steve jobs just thinks (and rightly so) that you'r rather rub your finger over nancy pelosi than...um (think of republicans in the news...)...alberto gonzalez or scooter libby.

also (comments via wonkette.com):

- If we don't defeat the Macs on the desktop we'll have to fight them in our pants pockets.

- I bet you didn't know that the iPhone, when pressed against a pregnant woman's belly, performs abortions too. Ah, technology today...

- I'm assuming a Conservative Handheld would have a monochromatic screen (since everything is black and white), no networking functions (it's a unilateral gadget, dammit!), garbles all input and output, is slow, and crashes all the time. Ergo, an Apple Newton!

best (and most appropriate) use of devil's fingers ever

at least his fingers feel the need to confess to the bulgarians that he's the devil...i wonder if it smells of sulfur still in bulgaria? bonus points for anyone who gets that chavez reference.

biblical adam: the bedroom acrobat

so there's a museum dedicated to creationism... in kentucky (where else?) ... and they made a video about how god created the universe a la genesis...and then this happened:

In a video shown at a new museum purporting to demonstrate how God created the universe, actor Eric Linden portrays Adam breathing life's first breath. A jaunt around the Internet shows Linden posing alongside a drag queen on an explicit Web site he owned called Bedroom Acrobat, the Associated Press reports. The Web site allows its network of members to post explicit stories and photos, AP reports. When it learned of Linden's activities with the Web site, the Creation Museum in Kentucky pulled the 40-second video in which he appears. "We are currently investigating the veracity of these serious claims of his participation in projects that don't align with the biblical standards and moral code upon which the ministry was founded," a spokesman for Answers in Genesis, which built the newly opened museum, said in a written statement to AP.

answers in genesis? really? i suppose that explains the logic behind the associated group "intelligence in george w. bush." still, the idea of a drag queen w/ adam and eve in the garden of eden is pretty awesome.

senator mousy mcguestworker

well, the whole debate was a little like a mouse running in a wheel...but still, the democrats really don't need any help looking like captured mice.

you hadn't taken it away by now?!

yeah, this comes a tad late...about 15 years and thoudands of lives too late. next they'll be giving dear leader a degree for his services to korea.

"Edinburgh University's Senate has agreed to strip Zimbabwe president Robert Mugabe of his honorary degree. It comes after years of campaigning by politicians and students because of Mugabe's brutal regime. In 1984 Robert Mugabe was honoured by Edinburgh University "for services to education in Africa."

is 1000% inflation, starvation, and one-party domination a service to africa? apparently it is to the scots. odd.

o'reilly on immigration (read: non-white people)

in a "conversation" with john mccain, the big talking head did most of the talking, o'liely dropped this precious soundbite on what he thinks the left wants to do via immigration:

Do you understand...what The New York Times wants and the far-left want? They want to breakdown the white Christian male power structure of which you are a part, and so am I. And they want to bring in millions of foreign nationals to basically breakdown the structure that we have. In that regard, Pat Buchanan is right. So I say that you've got to cap it with a number.

pat buchanan is far right, but not correct, billo...well, he's acknowledging the fact that there is a white christian male power structure, so that's something. but billo, we really don't need millions of foreign nationals to bring the structure down. in fact, the guest worker program will only help further solidify the white christian male (aka corporate) power structure. so basically, bill no likely the non-white people. but we can't have logic in the no-spin zone.

that would get your mike cut off.

alabama apologizes for slavery

talk about overdue...at this rate they'll apologize for selma sometime in the 23rd century.

"This proves Alabama is open for everyone and we are ready to improve race relations," said state Rep. Mary Moore, a Birmingham Democrat who sponsored the resolution. "The issue of slavery and its impact on the country had been kept in the closet until a few Southern states said, 'We want to take it out of the closet."

in the closet? oh, that's an unfortunately poor analogy...and you're only now ready to improve race relations? and this is a democrat saying this? oy. at this rate, they'll apologize for selma sometime around 2341.