in memory of st. rudy of 9-11...

wonkette has complied the top 6 rudy "i'm running for president of 9/11" giuliani sept. 11 references in honor of his now-imploded campaign. i know, how can you pick just six out of...well, at least 911 of them...oh rudy...

6: After Rudy placed sixth in the Iowa caucus, all the newspaper and teevee reporters wanted to know if this in any way “worried him,” it being sixth place and all. But he told the New York Daily News that it didn’t, although another time in his life something else happened and, indeed, he was worried: “None of this worries me - Sept. 11, there were times I was worried.”

5: After Hillary sobbed like a little whore in New Hampshire, the folks at MSNBC wanted to know if the Mayor of Everything ever sobbed. And he did, at the various 9/11 funerals! Was this because of the death surrounding him? Or was it then when he realized he could turn this into a lucrative “security” firm as well as a failed presidential bid?

4: When Rudy’s firewall in Florida collapsed — other humans forgot he existed after a while — he knew just the trick to win over those similarly one-track-minded Floridians: mention that 9/11 and hurricanes are both bad things, and that he should be the president by default.

3: Muslims are torturing, killing, Americans are dying, a religion bastardized, fires, mayhem, planes, illegal guns, Iran, nuclear weapons, fear, fear, jihad, Al Qaeda, no freedom, rape, Muslim rape. Image of World Trade Center rubble. Rudy’s best ad.

2. Rudy was on fire one night before the John Birch society, which drinks as much if not more blood than Rudy on a Saturday night. He let it all out:

“This war ends when they stop coming here to kill us!” Giuliani said in his speech. “Never, ever again will this country ever be on defense waiting for [terrorists] to attack us if I have anything to say about it. And make no mistake, the Democrats want to put us back on defense!” Giuliani said terrorists “hate us and not because of anything bad we have done; it has nothing to do with Israel and Palestine. They hate us for the freedoms we have and the freedoms we want to share with the world.”

1. In September — the same month that 9/11 happened several years ago — an “independent, non-denominational grass-roots campaign to raise $10,000” organized a special “theme” for its fundraiser: it requested $9.11 donations for a delightful fear party. The Giuliani team distanced itself from the private event after, you know, the media heard about it, and they even returned the $9.11 donations after many weeks. This may not have been Rudy himself, but nothing more accurately described the Giuliani Campaign’s basis for existence, ever.

she's like the black patti labelle!

the view's resident conservative town fool (and i don't mean that hassleback chick), sherri "i'm not sure if the world is flat cause i'm too busy feeding my kid" shepherd has once again made joy behar look like a nobel laureate:

mitt let the dogs out and looked like an idiot

nothing good ever comes from referencing the baha men on mlk jr. day. nothing.

later....

At a King parade in Florida Mitt Romney offered advice to African Americans. “Teach kids they should get married before they have babies and encourage the formation of families. It’s an enormous advantage to kids.”

hucabee pulls a rick "man-on-dog" santorum

just when you thought the national political arena was safe from more gay marriage is like bestiality analogies, along comes mike huckabee:

"Well, I don’t think that’s a radical view to say we’re going to affirm marriage. I think the radical view is to say that we’re going to change the definition of marriage so that it can mean two men, two women, a man and three women, a man and a child, a man and animal. Again, once we change the definition, the door is open to change it again. I think the radical position is to make a change in what’s been historic."

this from a guy whose kid hung a stray dog, ya know, to death...maybe he should worry about that kind of man on animal action and the family value of teaching your kid not to kill dogs.

c-span makes a "new" error

no wonder he got so few votes in new hampshire...who votes for the senator from mexico?

what's finishing sixth in iowa feel like?

“None of this worries me - Sept. 11, there were times I was worried.” - Rudy Giuliani

ok! enough already, let just make him president of 9/11 and be done with it.



btw, nicely done young-people-who-love-the-obama...that was quite something...on to nh and maybe some more clinton-thwomping?

top 10 quotes of the year

as listed in the Yale Book of Quotations:

10. "I think as far as the adverse impact on the nation around the world, this administration has been the worst in history."
-- Jimmy Carter, interview in Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, May 19


9. "I mean, you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy. I mean, that's a storybook, man."
-- Sen. Joseph Biden, D-Del., describing Sen. Barack Obama, quoted in New York Observer, Feb. 4


8. "[I have] a wide stance when going to the bathroom."
--Larry Craig, senator from Idaho, explaining why his foot touched that of an undercover policeman in a men's room (as noted by the interviewing policeman), June 11


7. "I'm not going to get into a name-calling match with somebody [Vice President Dick Cheney] who has a 9 percent approval rating."
-- Harry Reid, senator from Nevada, remarks to the media, April 24


6. "There's only three things he [Rudy Giuliani] mentions in a sentence: a noun and a verb and 9-11."
-- Joseph Biden, senator from Delaware, comment at Democratic presidential debate, Oct. 30


5. "I don't recall."
-- Alberto Gonzales, U.S. attorney general, repeated response to questioning about firing of U.S. attorneys, congressional testimony, April 19


4. "That's some nappy-headed hos there."
-- Don Imus about Rutgers University women's basketball team, Imus in the Morning radio broadcast, April 4


3. "In Iran we don't have homosexuals like in your country."
-- Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, president of Iran, at a Columbia University appearance, Oct. 10


2. "I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because some people out there in our nation don't have maps and I believe that our education like such as South Africa and the Iraq everywhere like such as and I believe that they should our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S. or should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future for our children."
-- Lauren Caitlin Upton, Miss South Carolina Teen USA, responding to a pageant question about why one-fifth of Americans are unable to locate the United States on a map, Aug. 24



1. "Don't tase me, bro!"
-- Andrew Meyer, University of Florida student who had been questioning Sen. John Kerry, being dragged away by campus police using a Taser stun gun, Sept. 17

hey, the south africa is in the news unrelated to miss teen s. carolina

...but it's not really a good thing...via wonkette:

Because there are hardly any pressing problems left in South Africa with which its government must deal, two weeks ago President Thabo Mbeki (on the left) signed into law a bill that makes it a criminal offense for teenagers under 16 to “kiss, touch or rub up against each other in public.” They probably did this in some sort of half-assed effort to stop the spread of AIDS in South Africa, since they don’t really want to get into things like comprehensive sex education and massive condom distribution programs and whatever, not that Mbeki believes that HIV causes AIDS anyway. This was, in fact, also the rule at my high school, and I was warned for holding my boyfriend’s hand under the lunch table and then given detention for whispering in his ear and it definitely didn’t stop me from having sex, so take that lunchladies and stupid government leaders! What did keep me from getting pregnant/diseased from said sexing, though, was the extremely comprehensive sex ed classes that were required by the State of New York and taught without embarrassment by our teacher. But, hey, a new law criminalizing teenage PDA is sooo much better.

Once again: abstinence only education doesn't teach you how to not have sex, it teaches you how to not have safe sex. also, i hope they don't have crowded buses or subways in cape town...otherwise you could commit about 10 crimes on your way to work by unwillingly rubbing up against some random guy with the strange hat...