file under: better late than never

via the national journal:

Washington Democrat Jay Inslee plans to introduce articles of impeachment against Attorney General Alberto Gonzales on Tuesday, House sources confirmed.  The House needs only a simple majority to impeach Gonzales -- an entirely probable scenario. In order to convict, or expel, Gonzales, a two-thirds vote is required in the Senate. That's a little trickier to predict, but judging by the AG's performance on the Hill last week, certainly not out of the realm of possibility.  Bush has used vetoes to stymie every congressional effort to change course in Iraq and increase funding for embryonic stem cell research. He would not be able to reverse a congressional impeachment of a Cabinet member, however.  Impeaching Gonzales would not only hand Bush a major professional failure -- the removal of the nation's first Latino attorney general -- but could actually hit the infamously loyal president where he lives. Bush has barely flinched at the constantly swelling tidal wave of anger and outrage directed at him. The forced removal of Gonzales could be the first blow that he actually feels.

washington post spend 700+ words on hilary's cleavage

really? so she wore a slightly low-cut top on the senate floor. so fricking what?

"With Clinton, there was the sense that you were catching a surreptitious glimpse at something private. You were intruding -- being a voyeur."

next week, hilary's legs...could someone tell the post to try and cover, oh, i don't know, the NEWS!!!

can i get a retroactive discount on my history degree?

"ok son, we will pay for you to go to college, but only if you major in one of the cheap departments."
from the new york times:

Starting this fall, juniors and seniors pursuing an undergraduate major in the business school at the University of Wisconsin, Madison, will pay $500 more each semester than classmates. The University of Nebraska last year began charging engineering students a $40 premium for each hour of class credit.

And Arizona State University this fall will phase in for upperclassmen in the journalism school a $250 per semester charge above the basic $2,411 tuition for in-state students.

Such moves are being driven by the high salaries commanded by professors in certain fields, the expense of specialized equipment and the difficulties of getting state legislatures to approve general tuition increases, university officials say.

lou has lost it...but does he still hate mexicans?

so, do the illegal immigrants get to take part in your hug, too, mr. dobbs?
it's the "not a scientific poll" part that just kills me.

president bush hates children...or at least insured ones

from today new york times editorial:

President Bush is threatening to veto any substantial increase in spending for a highly successful children’s health program on the bizarre theory that expanding it would be the “beginning salvo” in establishing a government-run health care system. His shortsighted ideological opposition would leave millions of children without health insurance at a time when medical costs are soaring.

The president’s ire was provoked by a bipartisan bill approved by the Senate Finance Committee last week that would expand the so-called State Children’s Health Insurance Program, a joint federal-state effort that, over the last decade, has substantially reduced the number of uninsured children in the country. The program, known as S-chip, seeks to cover children whose family income is too high to qualify for Medicaid but too low to afford costly private coverage. It is due to expire on Sept. 30 unless Congress reauthorizes it....

cheney officialy becomes president

via wonkette.com's dept. of we kinda saw this coming

We are officially doomed. Tony Snow just announced that Dick Cheney is taking over as president, officially this time, as George W. Bush is being shipped off to “Camp David” to “have his ass checked out for cancer.” Say good-bye to Dubya. Yes, you hated him, but soon you’ll be missing him.

They’re putting Bush “under amnesia,” according to the Associated Press bulletin that just hit the wires. And that will be different how, exactly, than a regular day for Bush? We assume they mean he’s going to be knocked out with drugs … and that he’ll never awake.

gerald ford, dead again today at the senseless age of 93...

when he was mauled to death by lions in a convenience store. he was delicious.

from the washington post

cause eating your friends can be delicious and high in fiber

Other Cereals From the Makers of Kashi's "Good Friends."
BY DAVID WOLINSKY
- - - -

Strictly Platonic O's

Let's Get a Divorce Honey Nut Cheerios

We're No Longer Speaking Give Me Back My Blender Nut Clusters

Prenuptial Wheat Crisps

I'm Having Your Bastard Child Reginald Grainfest

'nsync creator faces 130 years in prison

stup ...and no, it's not for subjecting our ears to such musical classics such as "bye, bye, bye," "i drive myself crazy," and "(god must have spent) a little more time on you." while those would be worthy of at least a few years in the pokey, this lou pearlman fellow (apparently also responsible for those backstreet boys) is in trouble for other reasons:

Former boy-band impresario Lou Pearlman, known for launching 'N Sync and Backstreet Boys, refused on Wednesday to enter a plea to fraud charges in an alleged $100 million swindle.

Pearlman, who left the United States in January ahead of the federal charges and was caught in Indonesia using the alias A. Incognito Johnson, was ordered held without bond pending a future hearing.

"In order to not waive any jurisdictional issues that may arise, I will stand mute, Mr. Pearlman will stand mute as to the indictment," his lawyer, Fletcher Peacock, told Judge Donald Dietrich during an arraignment in US District Court in Orlando.

now if only he could have gotten his bands to stand mute as well.

republican sen. vitter (la) admits to paying a hooker for sex after it is revealed he paid a hooker for sex

cause nothing makes photoshop fun like a good madam's list story

more armed iraqi civilians? i don't see any way this can't work

i'm shocked the fox noise channel hadn't thought of this earlier. now if you could only find a way to make sure they don't shoot the guns at us...

cause they can only win if they cheat

like we still needed any proof...
dateline: tallahassee
Internal city memos show the issue of Republican "vote caging" efforts in Jacksonville's African-American neighborhoods was discussed in the weeks before the 2004 election, contradicting recent claims by former Duval County Republican leader Mike Hightower - the Bush-Cheney campaign's local chairman at the time.

"Caging" is a longtime voter suppression practice by which political parties collect undeliverable or unreturned mail and use it to develop "challenge lists" on Election Day.

The contradiction comes to light as the U.S. Justice Department continues to consider a June 18 request from two U.S. senators for an investigation into potential illegal voter suppression tactics in Duval County three years ago. A department spokeswoman said last week that the request is still being reviewed.

all this talk of caging makes me think of another person in the news: scooter libby...and a famous passage from his novel, the apprentice:

At age ten the madam put the child in a cage with a bear trained to couple with young girls so the girls would be frigid and not fall in love with their patrons. They fed her through the bars and aroused the bear with a stick when it seemed to lose interest. Groups of men paid to watch.

the president may make scooter's crimes vanish, but this book and its crimes are unpardonable.

lying libby drops the quarter mil

how much you wanna bet he tries to deduct this from his taxes? the odds are just as good that he'll become the new justice foxspert.

the commuter-in-chief

wonkette on the libby commutation:
Number of pardons Bush has granted: 113, less than any president in a century.
Number of pardons Bush has denied: More than 1,000.
Number of commutation requests Bush has denied: More than 4,000.
Commuting Cheney’s henchman’s prison sentence right after the bail appeal is denied by the U.S. Court of Appeals: Fuck you, America!

the "milkshake" song goes medieval

operation commando eagle

the latest iraq operation is "operation commando eagle"...or as the stephanie miller show has been calling it, "operation eagle without underpants."

mitt romney hates puppies

forget the fact that he can't go one week without changing his mind on some issue, he does stand firmly on one issues: his hatred of puppies.  on a family vacation drive in 1983, the following happened:

"Before beginning the drive, Mitt Romney put Seamus, the family’s hulking Irish setter, in a dog carrier and attached it to the station wagon’s roof rack …. Tagg Romney commandeered the way-back of the wagon, keeping his eyes fixed out the rear window, where he glimpsed the first sign of trouble. ”Dad!” he yelled. ”Gross!” A brown liquid was dripping down the back window, payback from an Irish setter who’d been riding on the roof in the wind for hours."

who sticks their dog in a cage on the roof of their car?  this can only mean one thing...i will now be forced to refer to him as mitt griswold.